Solomon’s Paradox: Do You Really Take Your Own Advice?

Solomon’s paradox describes a relatively ubiquitous psychological phenomenon: your friend approaches you for advice on a pressing problem; you give her great advice and she is very thankful for your wisdom.

Later on, you are faced with a similar problem yourself. However, in this case, you make a poor decision based on poor reasoning. In other words, Solomon’s paradox describes how people tend to be wiser when solving other’s problems than their own.

In this essay, we will begin by covering the origins of Solomon’s paradox. Following this, we will touch upon some psychological research work related to this paradox. Finally, we will explore how we can benefit from our knowledge of this paradox. Let us begin.

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Why is Solomon’s Paradox Called So?

King Solomon was the third ruler of the Jewish Kingdom. He possessed such wisdom that people travelled far and wide to seek his advice. He had solved numerous tricky problems by displaying impressive wit.

Yet, when it came to his personal life, he repeatedly made poor decisions that eventually led to his kingdom’s downfall. How is it that King Solomon was a paragon of wisdom to everyone else but himself?

So, paradoxically, he was both the wisest man and the most foolish man in the Jewish kingdom. Hence, people named this phenomenon Solomon’s paradox.

Even though most of us understand this phenomenon intuitively, anecdotal evidence is not enough to prove that it actually exists. Let us find out what science has to say about this topic?

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Scientific Research on Solomon’s Paradox

The Experiment

In 2014, Igor Grossmann and Ethan Kross of the University of Waterloo and the University of Michigan, respectively, published a paper exploring Solomon’s paradox (linked for reference at the end of the essay). They conducted three different studies to answer three critical questions:

1. Does Solomon’s paradox exist? Are people really better at reflecting on others’ problems better than their own?

2. Does “self-distancing” have a positive effect on wise reasoning?

3. Does older age have a positive effect on wise reasoning?

For their first study, they invited 100 participants who had been in long-term relationships and split them into two groups. Then, they asked the first group to imagine that their partner had cheated on them and the second group to imagine that their best friend’s partner had cheated on their best friend. Following this, they surveyed the subjects’ course of action.

For their second study, they split the first group into two sub-groups: one sub-group asked themselves “self-immersed” questions like “Why am I feeling this way?”, while the other sub-group asked themselves “self-distanced” questions like “Why does he/she feel this way?” Following this, the researchers again surveyed the subjects’ course of action.

For their third study, Grossmann and Kross conducted similar research between two groups: one in the age group of 20–40 and another in the age group of 60–80. This way, they could see if older age had a positive effect on wise reasoning.

The Outcome

The results of these studies revealed the following:

1. Subjects who imagined that their best friend’s partner had cheated could reason more wisely than those who imagined that their partner had cheated — an indication that Solomon’s paradox exists.

2. Subjects who asked themselves “self-distanced” questions reasoned indistinguishably from those who imagined that their best friend’s partner had cheated — evidence that self-distanced thinking improved wise reasoning.

3. There was no significant difference between older people and younger people when it came to wise reasoning. Both younger people and older people were equally susceptible to Solomon’s paradox.

What Does Science Have to Say about Scientific Research?

So far, we have scientifically established the following points:

1. Solomon’s paradox exists.

2. Self-distancing helps with wise reasoning.

3. One does not necessarily get wiser with age.

So, what now? For starters, did you really think that we have scientifically established the above points? Was it because of my account of the convincing study? Or was it because it was convenient for you to believe that Solomon’s paradox exists?

When I was researching this topic, Grossmann and Kross’s particular study came up prominently. I found similar accounts of the study to my own (thus far) on the internet. But when I dove into the paper first-hand, I noticed peculiar things. Let us go over them one by one.

Investigating the Studies

Remember that Grossmann and Kross invited participants in “long-term relationships” for the first study? Well, it turns out that they were 100 students in total (50 per group) from the University of Michigan. Of these, 67 were female; the mean age of the entire population was 20.35. Might I also mention that ALL of the participants were native English speakers?

What this study did, then, is the following generalisation:

Observation: It appears that Solomon’s paradox exists within a population of 100 individuals, predominantly female, all English-native speakers, all students with a mean age of 20.35.

Conclusion: Therefore, Solomon’s paradox exists in the entirety of humanity.

Is your scepticism-meter twitching yet? It should. But wait, there’s more! What is this “wise-reasoning” that this study judges? And how does it judge it?

Well, the research panel judged “wise reasoning” based on a questionnaire that was looking for the following traits:

1. Recognition of limits of one’s own knowledge.

2. Search for a compromise.

3. Consideration of other people’s perspectives.

4. Recognition of change/multiple ways the events may unfold.

It is unclear to me that ALL of these points correspond to “wise reasoning” objectively, inclusively, and sufficiently. What happened here is that the researchers decided what “wise reasoning” is, and judged their participants based on their criteria.

There are many more questionable things I noted in the study, but these points will suffice for this essay.

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What Can We Take Away From the Study?

It could be that Solomon’s paradox exists; it could be that self-distancing helps you make better decisions. Try it, and if it works for you, keep it.

However, when someone writes “Science says…”, be sceptical. Go deeper; ask questions; verify facts for yourself instead of trusting someone else’s words.

I argue that this study is one among many that practices pseudo-science. The authors refer to some studies that indicate that people discount information about base rates when case-based information is available. Yet, they do not go into base rates for the case that Solomon’s paradox might not be in effect.

For instance, how are we supposed to measure and quantify those situations where self-distancing does not help; when selfish and egocentric reasoning is in the best interest of the individual?

Solomon’s paradox could very well exist. But its existence does not eliminate the possibility that the opposite of Solomon’s paradox (whatever it is called) exists simultaneously.

Solomon’s Paradox: Should You Take Your Own Advice?

We cannot end this essay on a rant, can we? So, science and pseudo-science aside, let us look at some practical measures of dealing with the advice-asymmetry we face here.

The issue we are trying to avoid is poor reasoning when it comes to our own problems. So, one alternative is to ask your friends for advice and consider different perspectives when you have the time and space to do so.

When you do not have the time and space, self-distanced reasoning could help, but not always! It depends on the nature of the problem. Have you ever heard of the adage “Follow your gut feeling”? This adage (typically) recommends the exact opposite of self-distanced reasoning, and with good effect too!

Folks, my take on this topic is quite simple. Let us not try to be overly smart and over-complicate things here. We need not teach birds “aerodynamics” for them to fly efficiently. Similarly, we need not teach ourselves the psychological science of wise reasoning to make better decisions.

Do what feels right; ask for counsel if you have the time and space. If you make poor decisions on your own, try and learn from your mistakes to make better future decisions. King Solomon might just rest in peace knowing that we are all doing our best!

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Reference: Grossmann and Kross.

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Further reading that might interest you: The Strong Law Of Small Numbers and How To Really Understand Statistical Significance.

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